Review: ‘The Joys of Motherhood’ by Buchi Emecheta

Nnu Ego leaves her village to be with her new husband Nnaife in Lagos, after she failed to conceive with the first one. The tragedy of her first child amplifies her need to be a mother, for where she comes from, motherhood is the most honourable badge for a woman to wear. Her prayers are answered when she starts having children, but Lagos is not Ibuza and the more children one has is not quite the blessing she had anticipated.

In this wild beast of a city, having more mouths to feed means sinking deeper into the abyss of poverty. Nnu Ego’s whole life becomes defined by motherhood and wifehood, both incredibly demanding. With the impending war, the peasant life under British rule, and the weight of tradition, Nnu Ego’s circumstances don’t seem to have a chance at improving.

The Joys of Motherhood is both exquisite and devastating. I recently read Second-Class Citizen, also by Emecheta and so far, she and Mariama Bâ are the only authors who have truly impressed me with their clear depiction of motherhood and marriage, and the traditions and difficulties tethered to them. Nnu Ego is the daughter of an important person, yet there are things that are expected of her behaviour as a woman, wife and mother, that influence her decisions to stay and push through deprivation in its many forms.

The story doesn’t focus solely on the struggles of women, but with the state of the country we also get to see how men who tradition upholds as superior, become emasculated by oppression, and end up doing everything to reclaim their manhood at home. From beating their wives to taking more wives even when pockets don’t allow it. This then creates even more unfavourable conditions for women.

The value of girls is also one of the important subjects in the book and shows how considering boys more important than girls pours into different aspects of life, such as education, parenting, work, and marriage. Emecheta also shows us the loss of self, the individual, when becoming a mother and a wife.

This novel is a compelling piece of literary art, not only is it a voice for women in Nnu Ego’s time, but it does so for many Nnu Egos of today.

Revealing Racist, Misogynistic and Xenophobic Oppression in Buchi Emecheta’s ‘Second-Class Citizen’

“Father does not approve of women going to the UK. But you see, you will pay for me…”

Francis

From when she was a young girl, Adah’s dream was always to leave Lagos for the greener pastures of the United Kingdom. The decisions she’s made throughout her life have been in concert with this dream, and some of these decisions intensely difficult.

When she arrives in London, her hopes for the life she had always imagined are shattered. She meets the reality of what it means to be black in a white world, a black immigrant, and a woman at that. The husband she had known back in Nigeria has been replaced by a stranger. Adah must navigate through all these difficulties; the increasing number of children and raising them, providing for the family, and the deterioration in her marriage.

Although Adah finally get a good job in Nigeria, migrating to Europe was always a fantasy painted by the stories of those who had gone to pursue opportunities there. Despite being financially independent and being the provider for her family, her wants and needs to go to the land of her dreams must take a back seat to give priority to her husband’s plans.

The tyrannical nature of her marriage is a major theme, worsening at every turn. Parenthood and its roles based on gender is another interesting topic. The arrangement of duties is appallingly lopsided, that even though she provides for the household, almost all duties regarding the children are mainly hers. Emecheta pulls us towards the extent of male privilege and domination, and the normalcy they’re afforded.   

Second-Class Citizen is a splendid piece of feminist literature. Each character, especially the protagonist, is so well-developed that their contribution to the story brings out the intended piece of the plot to the stage. Each character understood the assignment.

The title itself is appropriate for the story; it encapsulates the crucial thread that runs through the whole novel. It’s a realistic novel, reflecting society at that time and also relevant to the present.

Through all the adversities our main character faces, there is much to admire about her. Read about these qualities in the previous character-focus post.

We Should All Read ‘The Power of Women’ by Dr Denis Mukwege

Nobel Peace Prize winner, Dr Mukwege is a Congolese gynaecologist who specialises in treating injuries from rape, and an awe-inspiring advocate of women’s rights. The Power of Women is a harrowing account of his professional and personal journey of witnessing the heinous crimes against women, and their strength and resilience through all their traumatic experiences.

There’s often this narrow-minded belief that men who speak out against the injustices against women, or who are feminists, are ‘thinking and behaving like women’, along with the pressure for these men to justify themselves and their sexuality whenever they stand up for women’s rights. Therefore, this book is so important and a necessary read for men. If one does not see the urgent need to have more men like Dr Mukwege, after all the stories of the suffering inflicted on women, and how rape is used as a social and political tool, then we’re swimming in deep shit.

Dr Mukwege’s stories show the many ways women’s bodies are used as a deliberate power tactic in war, to make a political statement and to abuse power. However, the pages aren’t all dark and heart-breaking stories. He shows women’s power, their inspiring ability to find a reason to continue living and a new meaning to life, even after experiencing violence that destroys them in all ways imaginable. The ability to start over, and rebuild when everything has been taken away from them.

He also suggests many ways we, as society, can make the necessary changes. One of them is the need for a functioning justice system that listens to victims and deals with the tormenters in an effective way. He also suggests a cultural shift, breaking the silence and smashing taboos associated with sexual abuse and women’s bodies. Stripping out sexist language that refers to the honour, chastity, and modesty of women, is also another way.

There is so much to take in, to learn and to take with you when reading this book. It is a powerful stand against the disregard of women’s lives. It is thought-provoking, inspiring, distressing, and highly important.

I urge you to read it. Everyone needs to read it.

Another interesting book similar to this one is Women’s Liberation and the African Freedom Struggle by Thomas Sankara.